Dear Mom,
Camp is tough and these sandwiches you made just aren’t enough. Can you send some more? We went horseback riding today. I rode on a horse. Mom, do horses have meat? I sat on the horse and I’m pretty sure I felt some meat in there. The horse felt like meat. I will go riding again tomorrow. Okay. Don’t forget to send sandwiches.
Dear Mom,
We had swim test today. I swam pretty far, but other people swam farther. I could feel the lobsters and sharks swimming around down there under the lake. I felt them tickling my feet. I told them I could swim more if only I could swim in a pool where there were no lobsters and sharks. Tim told me about a girl who had her hand bit off by a shark while she was swimming. She has just one hand now. Mom, if you only had one hand, then how could you count to ten? I can count to a hundred now.
Dear Mom,
Today we rode in a robot. They made us all work together to paddle the robot. My arms got tired but I had to paddle anyway. We rode all the way to a desert island. There was even sand there. I didn’t see any treasure though. Later Tim showed us how to catch a fish. You don’t use your hands! I didn’t catch one single fish. Tim caught some. Have you seen a fish that is still wearing its skin? I mean in real life have you seen one? Tim wouldn’t let me eat any of the fish. I don’t like Tim. I like Tim sometimes, but not when he won’t share his fish.
Dear Mom,
We went on a camping trip yesterday. Camping is when you sleep on the dirt instead of on a bed. First we walked into the forest and then we slept on the dirt. I could feel all the rocks and worms in the dirt so I didn’t sleep too much. Tim built a fire for us, and we roasted wieners for dinner. Then Tim told us some scary stories, but they hardly scared me at all. He told us one about a monster named Big Food who is hairy all over and is very, very tall. Tim says that Big Food likes to eat campers for dinner instead of wieners, but I know that he is just a tall tale. Like Paul Bunyan and Santa. Wait. What’s that? I hear something outside and it is trying to eat me! Just kidding, Mom! There is no such thing as Big Food.
Dear Mom,
We learned how to make dream catchers. Dream catchers are circles with many feathers attached to them. You put them by your bed and the ghosts get caught in them. I guess ghosts like feathers a lot. Mom, why did you never tell me about dream catchers? If you had told me then maybe I would sleep more. Maybe the dream catcher could finally catch that mean, old lady from my nightmares.
Dear Mom,
Today we learned how to shoot bows and arrows. Just like Robin Hood and Pocahontas! Tim was supposed to show us how to do it but then he just left us there and went to go do something else. I tried to aim my arrow straight, but it just sort of fell and wouldn’t go anywhere. What am I doing wrong, Mom? When I get home, will you show me how to shoot my arrow right? Did you know, that in the olden days they caught all their food with bows and arrows? They must have been pretty hungry. I am glad we know how to get our food from the stores now. That was a good invention. Okay.
Dear Mom,
I am in the timeout room. I am in timeout for something I did wrong. I found a squirrel outside our cabin today. It was a dead squirrel though. There was a hole in its tummy and I stuck my hand in there and tried to eat some of it. Tim told me that it was wrong to do that. But it looked just like meatloaf! Tim said I have to write you a letter and tell you about it. Here is my letter, Mom! Okay. Timeout is almost over. We’re going swimming later.
Dear Mom,
This was the last day of camp. I will see you later today and give you this letter myself. This morning they gave everybody a little figurine shaped like an Indian. It is standing there and pointing at something. We are supposed to trade Indians with the best friend we made at camp. I gave mine to Tim and he said no, I should not give it him, I should give it to someone my own age. Mom, I forget how old I am. Mom, I am hungry. First I missed dinner last night in timeout for the squirrel and now I slept too long and missed breakfast. Mom, when I get home, can we go to Petco and get some dinner?